For 13 years, Britney Spears wasn’t allowed to stand up for herself. She was not allowed to speak publicly without a filter. Her every move was controlled, to the point of being forced to take medication and even have an IUD implanted against her will.
The fact that it was her own family who put her in this situation is even worse. She has clearly experienced trauma.
But now that she’s been released from her conservatorship, Britney just isn’t being nice enough for many people. Her sister Jamie Lynn has written a book in which she alleges all kinds of things about Britney, and Britney is being vocal about her anger.
Today the internet is abuzz because of an instagram post in which Britney calls her sister “scum.”
In weeks past, Britney has vacillated between angry outbursts and expressions of love for her sister. Because these emotions are complicated. And it’s hard to really come to grips with the fact that someone you love has betrayed you.
And while most people seem to be understanding of her need to express over a decade of pent up anger, there is a growing number of people making some dangerous and worrying statements.
Let me just interject here – tone policing a trauma victim is some serious bs. Don’t do that.
I say worrying and dangerous, because these are the exact “concerns” that got her placed under conservatorship in the first place.
This Is What The Aftermath of Trauma Looks Like
If these same people had seen my Facebook feed over the past several years they’d be saying the same things about me. Because I, too, posted rants and stream of consciousness vitriol about those who abused me. Sometimes when I get triggered I still do.
When you don’t have a voice for so long, and you finally do get a chance to speak up, this is what it looks like. You’re all over the place. You’re pissed the fuck off. Trauma has done things to your brain that make your thoughts disjointed.
Everything she’s done since the conservatorship was ended has borne classic hallmarks of trauma. She wasn’t allowed control of her body, so now she’s posing nude. She wasn’t allowed to criticize anyone so now she’s excoriating those who’ve wronged her.
What Britney needs now is space to heal. To be allowed to work through her trauma in her own way without having to fear being locked down again. Yes, she’s angry – she has every right to be.
And just because witnessing female rage makes people uncomfortable doesn’t mean Britney should have to suffer in silence. We SHOULD be uncomfortable about what happened to her. Had she not been famous, she would still be trapped and controlled and silenced. And that is not ok.
So cut the woman some slack. Give her time to get used to having a voice again. That’s what being free really means.